2008, Straight Up with a Twist

We are now well and truly into the 2008 Presidential election. And I'm depressed.

We're down to only two candidates who will be our next President. I'm not going to talk about the third party candidates, except to bring to your attention one statistic. 3 of 4 people with severe mental disorders are living below the poverty line. The other 1 of 4 is apparently running for national office. Bob Barr? Cynthia McKinney? Nader? If any of these clowns get in, either they must be medicated, or we will.

So I have to pick one of the two major party candidates. Damn.

Back in college, "major party" was sooo much more fun.

We have McCain. OK, I admire his military service and his determination. And I think he's right on the war. But he's bought into the "man-made global warming" kool-aid despite logic, reason, and oh, scientific evidence.

He thinks we should reward illegals for breaking the law. (What's next, free gas for DUI's?) His ethics have been questionable at best.

He may not be the candidate from hell, but damn close. Maybe the candidate from Newark. The only way I'll vote for him is if he's up against the candidate from hell.

Which brings us to Obama. Charismatic, but pretty much a standard Chicago/Daly machine politician.

Don't get me wrong, I like Chicago politics. Growing up in New Orleans, we all knew we had a lot of Zombie voters. The undead vote early and often. And Chicago is about the only place that's worse. Our only sense of pride in Louisiana elections was "At least we're not as bad as Chicago.

Obama changes positions more often than most folks change socks. And it's our fault if we think he's lying, it's just that us rubes don't understand "Nuance". Sorry, Senator. But I calls 'em as I sees 'em. "Nuance" sounds like a sophisticated way to say "I'm full of shit".

And those positions he's firm on are pretty much failed things from the past. Windfall profits tax? Tried that, failed utterly. Made things worse. Surrender to terrorists? We first tried that in the 1790's with, dare I say, Muslim terrorists and kidnappers. Led to the Tripolitan war, 1801-1804. We kicked the muslims ass, and they left us alone for a while. See Marine Hymn, "Shores of Tripoli", Battle of Derna, etc.

Tax our way to prosperity? Done that. Give the Europeans veto over how we lead our lives? Did that for a couple of hundred years. It seems Americans chafed at that, and defeated the worlds only superpower. Little thing called the American Revolution. Look it up sometime, should be in a grammar school history book.

And he has so little experience, he may actually believe his own PR.

OK, O'bama IS the candidate from hell. So I'll reluctantly pull the lever for McCain. but I'll hold my nose while doing it, and wash well immediately afterward.

Right now O'bama seems to be leading. Why?

Well the American voters are "pleading for change".

Pardon me, but I must have missed a memo.

Just when did the American People go from being proudly self reliant to unwashed downtrodden, holding a tin cup and pleading for change?

And if We as a People did, I can assure you that I, and most of my neighbors have not. I am no beggar asking my betters for alms. Besides, I hate metallic stemware.

No, I am a Man. I rely on my own abilities. I worked my arse off to get an education, when almost all my family and friends thought I couldn't do it. Sure, I was helped by a few great professors, vets, and encouraging friends. And I got loans to pay for it, I'm still paying for it.

Crime? I have a concealed handgun permit, and will carry if the situation requires. And shoot as needed. The bad guys may kill me, but they'll know they've been in a fight. I'll call the cops as soon as it's over.

Health Care? I've had my own health insurance since '91. I pay for it, myself. I made the CHOICE to have coverage. I didn't sit around and whine for it.

"But the cost!" I hear you cry. That's why I got an education. So I could earn enough, not "be given" enough, but earn enough to take care of my family.

Taxes? I play by the rules, pay what they say I owe so Big Government goons won't ckuck me in jail or take away my house. And I pay an accountant well to see that I don't have to pay more.

No, I take care of my family's needs. That's what a Man does.

I refuse to turn important decisions over to some Government bureaucrat to make for me. If I chose that route, at best I'd be some beggar boy in a government workhouse.

And I'm sure I'd be beaten for having a set of balls enough to say, politely, "Please Sir, Can I have some more?"

With apologies to Dickens and Oliver Twist.

Thenakedemperor